The 11 Differences Between Dating a Boy vs a Man Our conscious self is drawn to the positive qualities we yearn for, but our unconscious draws us to the. That's where I'm at right now, I'm over dating boys who don't know what they want or how to go out there and get it. I want a real man and I won't settle for less. That's why you can't settle for a boy, you need to find yourself a real man. They're the only ones you'll be able to sustain a successful relationship with.